The Girl Who Sat On My Lap (that one time)
Matthew Ryan Fischer
Dave didn’t see Emily coming, but
before he knew it she was next to him on the couch. He had been on the back
patio having a semi-serious conversation with Brendan, but was instantly
distracted. He had his arm stretched out across the back of the couch, so when
she sat so close, it was almost as if he had his arm around her.
“Have we met? I think we’ve met. What
was your name again?”
Dave had met Emily before. Multiple
times. Or at least they had been at the same parties before. He’d seen her. He
could recognize her. Perhaps she could recognize him too. The last time he had
seen her she had had a boyfriend.
“Dave.”
“Dave. Right.”
“We met on new year’s day. And that backyard
party last fall for Michelle’s birthday. They hired that karaoke DJ.”
“I don’t know.”
“Everyone was pretty drunk. Don’t
worry about it.”
“Yeah, sorry.”
Dave thought about moving his arm. He
didn’t want to seem presumptuous and was worried it might be awkward that he
had his arm on her. Not that she seemed to mind. Dave couldn’t help but think
of years earlier in High School and a girl named Carrie. Carrie had crossed a
drunken house party and sat on his lap and introduced herself. Carrie’s best
friend had been dating his best friend and someone must have thought it would
be a good idea if they could double date best friends. Chris appreciated the
effort, even if the relationship didn’t last more than six months.
Dave didn’t think Emily was
approaching him in similar fashion, but he was also really bad at reading
social cues. He wanted to keep this conversation going on any offshoot chance that
Emily was interested and her sitting so close was part of her style.
Dave didn’t know much about her, but
he knew a little about some of her previous boyfriends. He didn’t want to ask
about that. He also knew he had missed a chance to talk to her mere weeks
earlier. “You hosted a new year’s party this year.”
“Yeah, were you there?”
“No, I… I just heard about it.”
“I am famous.”
“You are. Kind of. Chris had invited
me.”
“That’s right, Chris told me he was
going to invite someone.”
Dave wanted to have a good reason for
skipping her party. It had been cold and rainy and he didn’t feel like driving
and his social anxiety had kicked in and he didn’t really want to be around a
bunch of strangers. He had also forgotten who Emily was when Chris had invited
him and was thinking of someone he used to have a crush on. But he didn’t want
to tell Emily that.
“Yeah, well, I kinda confused your
name and was thinking of a different Emily that Chris used to know. I was a
little shocked he was still talking to her, but I didn’t really want to go to
that. But if I had known it was you, I would have gone.”
“I do throw a good party.”
“Your reputation precedes you.”
“You missed out. I do a lot of
organizing and prep work. Games, food, drinks. I have a dry erase board.”
“I made a refrigerator full of Jell-O
shots one time.”
“For your yourself?”
“Yes. That’s right. Very different
sort of party.”
“Sounds like you have a problem. You
might want to seek professional help.”
“Nailed it. You got me.
Dave glanced the other way and saw
that Brendan had disappeared. Maybe Brendan needed another drink. Or maybe he
took one look at where the conversation was headed and realized he was a third
wheel. If that were the case, if it was that obvious, maybe this was all
intentional on her part. Maybe Emily had known who he was well before she sat
next to him and a feigned introduction was just an easy excuse to start
talking. Did life repeat itself with such simple opportunities? He hoped that
was the case. He would have to ask Chris or Brendan what they knew and when they
knew it and why hadn’t he been better warned in advance.
But that could wait. He needed to
focus and needed to think of something witty and interesting to make sure Emily
stayed sitting right where she was.
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